Good coach, poor selector. It will be hard – impossible, even – for Scotland coach Andy Robinson to avoid that tag when he names a team like the one he has done for Saturday’s Calcutta Cup match.
There is one pivotal position, stand-off – and, once again, Robinson has shown his conservative side by opting for Dan Parks.
The groans among Scotland supporters as that news sinks in will be heard from Shetland to Dumfries.
Scotland’s most pressing problem for the last decade has been an inability to score tries.
Let’s put this bluntly: with Parks at ten, Scotland look set once again to struggle in this most crucial of departments. That is because Parks has a fundamental inability to get his back-line moving as he should do.
Robinson could have eased that problem by naming two swift, skilful, passing centres outside Parks (Matt Scott and Nick de Luca, perhaps); but no, he has gone for Sean Lamont at 12.
Lamont has been possibly Scotland’s best winger for the last few years. He is courageous, feisty, strong and tackles like a demon. But his passing? It is about as good as Dan Parks’ tackling.
You have to feel sorry for de Luca at outside centre and Lee Jones playing his first international match on the wing, because they are unlikely to see the ball, not through the hands of the back division anyway.
It is now clear which way Scotland are going to play this match. It will be virtual ten-man rugby. The forwards will seek to dominate up front, Parks will kick for the corners and Scotland will look to play the game in England’s half, scoring points from penalties, dropped goals and maybe – miracle of miracles - even sneak a try from a rolling maul or two.
The travesty is that it doesn’t have to be like this.
Scotland have as good as a forward pack as the country has put out for years. The front five are heavy, experienced and skilled. They should dominate their English opponents and secure good and plentiful ball for the backs.
In fact, there is hardly a change that could be made in the forwards to improve them (those who saw Al Kellock’s performance for Glasgow against Leinster will feel aggrieved on his behalf, also because Kellock helped take the English line-out apart at Twickenham last year).
Robinson has gone instead for Jim Hamilton in the second row to provide power and Ross Rennie at seven to link with backs instead of John Barclay. David Denton is also well worth his selection at eight.
But, given the superiority he should get from his forwards, why then play a kicking ten and a non-passing, rumbling 12?
There was a good case to be made for playing the Edinburgh pair Mike Blair at nine and Greig Laidlaw at ten. They dovetail beautifully at Edinburgh with one stepping in for the other if their partner is tied down at the bottom of a ruck. Blair is also close to his best form from a few years ago with his kicking, in particular, excellent this season.
There is also a strong case for playing the Glasgow pair of Chris Cusiter and Duncan Weir at nine and ten. Cusiter is picked, but Weir – who has been keeping Ruaridh Jackson out of the Glasgow first team – can’t even make a slot on the bench.
Former England fly-half and rugby pundit Stuart Barnes recently pointed out the similarities between Scotland/Cardiff and Edinburgh/Wales. Edinburgh and Wales, he explained, play expansive, entertaining rugby and score dozens of tries.
Cardiff and Scotland, on the other hand, play dour, defensive, crash-ball rugby and grind out their wins.
The common denominator between Cardiff and Scotland is, of course, Parks. The Cardiff number ten has already earned the ire of his own club’s supporters this year for playing too deep, kicking away possession and not releasing his back line – traits, unfortunately, Scotland fans know only too well.
Parks is a good stand-off half for a one-dimensional game-plan, the sort that relies on defence, pressure and close wins based on kicking between the sticks.
But if Scotland want to play expansively and score tries, he is not the man to do it.
The bar, in this case, is being set by Ireland’s Jonathan Sexton. If anyone wants to see how to take the ball at speed on the gain line, release backs quickly and present the ball in front of players running on to it, then watch the Ireland number ten.
Oh, and if ever there was a bad omen for Scotland going in to Saturday’s game it must surely be the gaffe of the T-shirts with "Scotland Calcutta Cup Winners" printed on them being issued by mistake, by the SRU of all people.
With Robinson accusing England of arrogance, this is the last thing Scotland need. If Stuart Lancaster has any sense, he should pin that story up on the England changing-room wall.
Scotland now look arrogant, conservative and one-dimensional for a game they really should be up for winning – and winning well.
It really should be so much better. With Edinburgh sweeping all before them in their Heineken Cup group this year, scoring try after try and improving their defence at the same time, this was the ideal time to harness that for Scotland. Play an experienced pack, by all means, Mr Robinson – but inject some creativity behind, please.
This is virtually the same team Robinson played in the World Cup – which, if we need reminding, struggled to beat Romania, couldn’t score a try past Georgia, was beaten by both Argentina and a strife-torn England and ended up with fewer tries than almost anyone else in the tournament.
Maybe this time this team will click, maybe this time a green and inexperienced English team will play so badly Scotland will score hatfuls of tries and sweep them aside.
I would dearly love to be proved wrong.
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